I’ve been thinking a lot about relationships, I feel like my whole life I have, well maybe not my whole life but especially since I dated Chelsea my sophomore year of high school. I over think over analyze, I look at my relationships, I look at other relationships, and being a guys I want to be able to fix them all. Relationships have become a huge interest of mine, I love chick flicks (this info is to stay only on my page, if it were to leak out my reputation with my Young Life kids would be donezo.), I enjoy love poetry, and to boost my knowledge I have about a dozen podcasts of sermons about relationships.
My parents are divorced, and it has been my goal since I was little to not follow in the same footsteps as my parents to be successful in my relationships with the opposite sex. So more or less I have put a lot of pressure on myself to succeed. Then I became a Christian… and the Christian culture, other Christians, piles on their pressure to succeed in relationships. Many Christians I have encountered will go as far to say only date if you’re planning on marrying that person. So with that in mind every girl I ever dated all I could ever think about was marriage, and the pressure which came with that. What is the sense in that? Well I know dating will end in two things a break up or marriage and I realize there is no point in dating someone unless you can see yourself marrying that person. It has become so much bigger than that. I hear so many successfully married couples say “I’m married to my best friend.” When is the last time, a little kid made friends with someone only under the circumstances that; that friend was going to be your best friend for life. There is insane pressure put on dating, ‘make it work or you’re a failure.’
I was speaking with a mentor of mine yesterday he was giving me girl advice (just what every college student needs). We talked about just enjoying the company of the opposite sex, now when has the church ever said anything along those lines. ‘Enjoy your time with them. ’ If it’s right, its right, if it isn’t, it isn’t. He also spoke of keys to making relationships healthy and successful primarily keeping God first… always, his second point was communication. That advice doesn’t sound as cumbersome and stressful as with what the church was presenting for me. I hope God has Ms. Right out there for me, if not I’m sufficient with God and God alone.
“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Matthew 6:33
